Weird Celebrities

Who Said It? Charlie Vs Charlie!

posted by Chris Valentine

Charlie Manson vs Charlie Sheen!

Hi Folks! There’s recently been an article about crazy man Charlie Manson, who has broken his 20 year silence in a recent interview. Charlie Manson spoke to Vanity Fair Spain on the anniversary of his conviction 40 years ago for the Sharon Tate murders. (Source: Daily Mail)

It occurred to us that this Charlie sounds an awful like another Charlie. So here’s a pop quiz, hotshot.

Who Said It? Charlie vs Charlie!

Who made the following statements? Charlie Manson or Charlie Sheen? Figure out who said the following 45 statements. Answers at the end! (No cheating!)

1. I live in the underworld. I don’t tell people what to do. They know what to do. If they don’t know what to do they don’t come around me because I’m very mean, I’m very mean.

2. Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh.

3. I’m in the bullring. I run in the bullring with the heart of the world.

4. But you can’t focus on things that matter if all you’ve been is asleep for forty years. Funny how sleep rhymes with sheep. You know.

5. Dad kept us out of school, but school comes and goes. Family is forever.

6. I don’t play. I shoot people.

7. From my big beautiful warlock brain … You’re either in my corner, or you’re with the trolls.

8. I’m too bad. I’m a mean guy. I’m an outlaw. I’m a criminal.

9. Look down at me and you see a fool. Look up at me and you see a god; Look straight at me and you see yourself.

10. Here’s the good news. If I realize that I’m insane, then I’m okay with it. I’m not dangerous insane.

11. You have the right to kill me, but you don’t have the right to judge me. That’s life. There’s nobility in that. There’s focus. It’s genuine.

12. The real strong have no need to prove it to the phonies.

13. I don’t have time for their judgement and their stupidity and you know they lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children and look at their loser lives and then they look at me and they say, ‘I can’t process it’ well, no, you never will stop trying, just sit back and enjoy the show. You know?

14. I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.

15. I will have you removed if you don’t stop. I have a little system of my own.

16. I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man. Dying’s for fools, dying’s for amateurs.

17. People say you have to work on your resentments. Yeah, no, I’m gonna hang onto them and they’re gonna fuel my attack.

18. I’m probably one of the most dangerous men in the world if I want to be. But I never wanted to be anything but me.

19. They’re looking for something dirty in everything, and if you’re looking for something, you’ll find it. You have to put up some kind of face for them, and that’s the only face they understand.

20. I have one speed, I have one gear: go!

21. If you’re going to do something, do it well. And leave something witchy.

22. I just didn’t believe I was like everybody else. I thought I was unique.

23. The news media has already executed me and buried me…If anyone is hypnotized, the people are hypnotized by the lies being told to them…There is no attorney in the world who can represent me as a person. I have to do it myself.

24. When I go on the mountain and I say “Do it!”, it gets done. And if it doesn’t get done, then I move on it. And that’s the last thing in the world you want from me!

25. I will have you removed if you don’t stop. I have a little system of my own.

26. I just don’t want to live like I used to. And at some point, I’m going to put a gag order on myself in terms of talking about the past. I’ve got to slam the door and deal with the present and the future.

27. Just because you’re convicted in a court room doesn’t mean you’re guilty of something.

28. I’m bi-winning. I win here, I win there.

29. I think my passion is misinterpreted as anger sometimes. And I don’t think people are ready for the message that I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of violent love.

30. No sense makes sense.

31. I’m a boxcar and a jug of wine… and a straight razor—if you get too close to me.

32. I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time – and this includes naps – I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.

33. There’s nothing wrong with being incompetent … it just means you don’t have to do as much.

34. I never thought I was normal, never tried to be normal.

35. I’ve got mad energy for days. That’s what people can’t get their minds around. They say, ‘Oh, he’s going to crash.’ They try to apply all these common terms to a guy who is not common. I don’t fit into their little box.

36. I was playing with some Hell’s Angels that you don’t know nothing about.

37. It’s not an act. I love it. It’s totally original. People go, ‘What’s going on with this guy? Why does he sound so weird? What is going on in his brain. I don’t know. Just one day I suddenly woke up with a new brain.

38. I’m an outlaw and I go so far and then that’s all you know.

39. What they’re not ready for is guys like you and I and Nails and all the other gnarly gnarlingtons in my life, that we are high priests, Vatican assassin warlocks. Boom. Print that, people. See where that goes.

40. No, I don’t think the drugs have hurt me. If I overdone it I think it would.

41. You either love or you hate. You live in the middle, you get nothing.

42. If I could get some help from the doctor then I could get my mind straightened out a little bit and I come back and play like a human.

43. I punched my mother out once.

44. As kids we’re not taught how to deal with success; we’re taught how to deal with failure. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. If at first you succeed, then what?

45. You can’t process me with a normal brain.


1. Manson 2. Sheen 3. Manson 4. Sheen 5. Sheen
6. Manson 7. Sheen 8. Manson 9. Manson 10. Sheen
11. Sheen 12. Manson 13. Sheen 14. Sheen 15. Manson
16. Sheen 17. Sheen 18. Manson 19. Manson 20. Sheen
21. Manson 22. Sheen 23. Manson 24. Manson 25. Manson
26. Sheen 27. Manson 28. Sheen 29. Sheen 30. Manson
31. Manson 32. Sheen 33. Manson 34. Manson 35. Sheen
36. Manson 37. Sheen 38. Manson 39. Sheen 40. Manson
41. Sheen 42. Manson 43. Manson 44. Sheen 45. Sheen

Remember, folks, what Charlie (Manson) said once: “You know, a long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody’s crazy.”

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